Choose Better
Your privacy is protected
Before anything else, here is our promise to you.
What we will never do
Share your data with courts, law enforcement, or partners
Sell your information to anyone
Require you to create an account
Store anything you cannot delete instantly
2 of 5
What is domestic violence?
A clear definition
Most men think domestic violence means something extreme. Read this carefully.
"Domestic violence is any pattern of behavior used to control, intimidate, or harm someone you are in a relationship with — physical, verbal, emotional, financial, or sexual."
The word pattern matters. It is not just a single incident.
This includes:
Hitting, pushing, or physical force
Yelling, name-calling, putting her down
Controlling who she sees or where she goes
Controlling money or finances
Pressuring or forcing sexual contact
3 of 5
What is at stake
The person you are hurting
"The person you are hurting loves you. Or loved you. She is not your enemy. She is the person you chose. Her feelings are real. Her pain is real. And your actions are influencing both."
Your behavior also puts everything else at risk:
Your children
Loss of custody. Supervised visits. Your children learning that this is normal.
Legal consequences
Arrest, criminal record, restraining orders, jail time.
Your future
Financial loss, isolation, living with guilt that does not go away.
4 of 5
One more thing
Relationships are complicated
Sometimes the people we love say and do things that hurt us deeply. That pain is real and it matters.
Protecting yourself means:
Removing yourself from situations that are escalating
Setting healthy boundaries through conversation
Reaching out for support — not responding with harm
Her difficult moments never excuse your harmful behavior. And your harmful behavior is always your responsibility — regardless of what led to it.
5 of 5
Do you want to be a different kind of man?
Not for anyone else. For yourself. Because the man you want to be does not hurt the people he loves.
That takes courage.
Recognizing that you want to be better is the most important step. This app is here to help you — one day at a time.
What happens next
A quick daily check-in — just a few taps
Tools for moments when things escalate
Honest guidance, no judgment
Private. Always.
Choose Better
Good morning.
You made a commitment. Here is where you are.
0
Day streak
1
Days in app
0
Calm days
this week
Today
Need help now? 1-800-799-7233
Choose Better
How are you right now?
Be honest. No one sees this but you.
CalmVery stressed
Any of these today?
Tap all that apply. Even small things count.
Worth noticing
Are things escalating right now?
If today feels urgent, the in-the-moment tools are one tap away.
Need help now? 1-800-799-7233
Check-in logged.
Choose Better Your pattern
Last 7 days
Your stress level each day.
7 days agoToday
Warning signs you have logged
Only patterns from your actual check-ins appear here.
What your pattern tells you
Need help now? 1-800-799-7233
Choose Better
Right now
Use this when you feel something building. If you are already in the middle of a fight, put the phone down and come back when you have stepped away.
Breathing exercise
60 seconds to slow your body down.
Grounding exercise
Bring yourself back to the present moment.
You already know something is wrong or you would not be here.
That awareness is your strength. Use it.
Need help now? 1-800-799-7233
Step 1 of 4
Breathing exercise
Tap the circle and follow the rhythm. Four cycles.
Tap the circle to begin
In for 4  ·  Hold for 4  ·  Out for 4
Grounding exercise
Look around you. Answer each one out loud or in your head.
See
Name 5 things you can see right now.
Touch
Name 4 things you can physically feel.
Hear
Name 3 things you can hear right now.
Breathe
Take 2 slow deep breaths. Feel your feet on the floor.
You are here. You are not in danger.
You can choose what happens next.
You did that.
You felt something escalating and you chose differently. That is not small. That is the whole point of this app.
When you go back, listen more than you speak. The conversation is not over — it is just starting from a better place.
"Every time you choose to step away and come back calm, you become more of the man you want to be."
Choose Better
Choose Better
Beta · For evaluation only
What this app is
Choose Better is a private, daily tool to help men recognize patterns in their own behavior and make different choices before those patterns cause harm. It is built on the belief that change is possible — and that most men who hurt the people they love do not want to.
What this app is not
This app is not a substitute for a Batterer Intervention and Prevention Program (BIPP), professional counseling, or emergency services. If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, call 911. If you are ready for deeper work, a structured program with a trained professional is the right next step.
Your privacy
Nothing you enter in this app is shared with anyone — not courts, not law enforcement, not partners, not advertisers. Your data lives on your device only. You can delete everything at any time in settings.
If someone needs help right now
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233
Call or text, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Need help now? 1-800-799-7233
Settings
Privacy protected
Daily check-in reminder
A short prompt each day
Reminder time
Currently set to 8:00 AM
Trusted names
Coming soon — first names only, no numbers stored
›
Passcode lock
Coming soon — require a code to open the app
About this app
›
Privacy policy
Plain language — no legal jargon
›
Permanently deletes all check-ins, patterns, and names from this device. Cannot be undone.
Add Choose Better to your home screen for the best experience.